I often find myself looking back to that cold rainy day on January 23, 2011 at Wright Patterson AFB while I was serving my Drill Weekend and speaking to my 1st Shirt about an upcoming deployment he needed some guys for. Little did I know or was aware that on this date at approx 3:15 that afternoon I would be notified via text I was the father to an adorable healthy baby boy weighing in at 7lbs 3oz. Nothing can prepare you for the flood of emotions that come upon you when you hear a part of something you did come into this world and it will change your life forever.
Liam Brenneke was born into this world on Jan 21, 2011 and my Ex-Wife had never decided to let me know she was even expecting to have a child or involve me in such an experience. You see, back in 2010 I was married for a very short time, and my wife at the time stated she really was wanting to have a child, when she found out she was pregnant with our child she filed for divorce and moved out claiming she was in love with another man... if that wasn't the killer of it all a few days after leaving the relationship she called and stated she lost the child through miscarriage and that brought new pain to the already broken marriage.
I began to accept the events for what they were and trusted in the Lord to hear my cry for healing and help grant me peace to grow and learn from such occurrences and to find love again. I told myself this is a fresh start to start a new, to grow and begin living for me. I was full of guilt and pain as I never prepared myself to cope with a loss of a child or my marriage but I was ready to help others to cope with their life events and tragedies. Do you know that Public Services employment carries a 79% divorce rating? I never wanted "I Do" to become "I Don't".
That was 6 years ago and two long years of custody battles in three different jurisdictions and five different judges and plenty of heartache! I may not be a perfect role model for my son, but you know what? When I look into his eyes and I see those blue eyes and that big smile, I know exactly what God was trying to tell me when Liam came into my life, "Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
If there is a learning or teaching moment here, I would say to other fathers who are struggling with their spouse or significant other about their lives and the lives of the children of the relationship, I want you to know that the choices we make today will not only affect our tomorrows but will ultimately be passed to our children as they are the lives that carry on our Legacy. Don't let two humans dislike or lack of trust, cause you to teach your child it's ok to mistreat their mother or father. Be the rooted foundation your child needs to expect nothing less but respect, honesty and moral behavior around those they come into contact.
My father raised me to stand up for what's right and to honor my mother, I may not and do not agree with her every choice or decision, but I manage to tolerate and respect those choices. I am trying daily to be that influence in my sons life and I can't be more happy to see the fruits of my labor as he grows into a talented and stron godly young man!
